TAS: A Fairy Tale

There is a post to explain the name of this blog but I left out one key story that prompted the popularization of my nickname "Sopa."  So let me quickly tell you how it happened...

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Once upon a time, in a land called TAS in the kingdom of AXA Assistance USA worked a humble maiden by the name of Vanessa with a simple last name of only 4 letters, Soto.  Her full name was nothing difficult to pronounce or complicated to spell.  Vanessa Soto.  Everyone she ever crossed paths with could say it, spell it, whisper it, and some times even sing it.

That is until that fateful Monday morning at 11am when evil was lurking through the phone lines.  As she typed away entering cover stamps and reviewing eligibility documents, a most ominous ring tone came through her phone.  Rrrring... Rrriing........riiiinnnng.

Ms. Soto answers the phone as is standard procedure by the order of the Grand Magistrate in Quality.  "Thank you for calling Top Travel Assistance.  My name is Vanessa.  Can you please provide your membership number?"  Perfect tone, perfect pronunciation, and perfect pace.

The ogre on the other line, however, has a raspy voice and demands to speak with Ms. Rita Lopez.  "Where is she?  I need to speak to her about my claim.  I need to get answers right now or I will blow your house DOWN!"

The lovely damsel quickly took action and explained to the fearsome monster that Ms. Lopez was unavailable and his claim could not be processed until all the eligibility documents were in place.  Per the notes provided by the magic mirror called Liberty, he was still missing his E-ticket.  Despite the delays in communications, the ogre could still submit his E-ticket before the expiration date when the Curse of Denial was applied.

The ogre was astounded by the information collected by his puny ears.  So much so that he could not think of anything else to do but to agree to the next steps.  The maiden's voice was so enchanting that he was disoriented and could not distinguish between different vowels in the Castillian language.  He asked the maiden for her name and the maiden could not deny him the honor.  The exchange went like this...

Ogres with poor hearing can seriously damage a person's name.

Maiden - "Vanessa Soto, sir."
Ogre - "Vanessa Sopa?"
Maiden - "No, sir.  Vanessa Soto.  S-O-T-O.  Soto."
Ogre - "Ooh ok.  Vanessa SOPA."
Call ended.

Moments later...

A letter handwritten by the ogre arrived by her favorite owl, Fax, and in it he described his gratitude for all the excellent service.  Everything seemed well until the maiden was tied to her seat by the curse the ogre attached to the header of the letter.  It was not addressed to Vanessa Soto.  It was addressed to  Vanessa Soto SOPA.  The ogre changed the maiden's life forever with that letter.  Everyone who read that letter could not remember her name any longer.  From that day forward, her first name was dropped and only her misspelled last name existed. SOPA.
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This one was for my good friend, Christian Velasquez AKA Crispy.  You're hilarious, buddy.


I don't want to make this post much longer but I'll take a moment to remind you all that I have about 5 work days left.  Approximately 14 days left before I leave for Uganda.  I am selling some of my items to earn some extra dollars for my emergency plane ticket I might need to take to get home.  Inquire by email, phone, text, fax, or owl.  I have a movie night happening tomorrow and a series of beer nights at Bennigan's.  You can find me there and in Mexico in the next two weeks.

Until next time. Thank you for calling.

7 Reasons My Friend Jim is Awesome

As promised, Jim gets a post dedicated solely to him and below are the reasons why.

1)  He is the first person to acknowledge that he read by blog.  I know I haven't publicly announced it on a Facebook status but I did put it on my Google Plus account.  That should count for something.

2) He did not rip my posts apart with a red pen.  He can be a grammar Nazi at times but nope, not this time and for that I am thankful. Their ain't no worst thing than a grammer Nazi. (Right, Jim?)

3) He has not predicted a horrible death for me in Uganda.  Others have suggested that I might get mauled by lions or get stung by a mosquito holding the black fly blindness.  Heck, some still think there is a chance Joseph Kony will barge into my hut.  Not Jim.  He wants me to live long and prosper.

4) While everyone else is watching their novelas and hockey/baseball/football/soccer/rugby games, he is downloading movies and shows for my external hard drive so that I may not miss out on American cinema while I am abroad.  Dude, you rock!

5) He promised to share his e-book collection for my kindle.  Still waiting on that link but no pressure.  I'm sure it'll come any day now.

6) His son, Anthony aka Ani, is friggin' adorable and smart. He created and is raising another awesome human being.  Go Jim!

7)  Just when I get that phone call with a member needing a medical evacuation, Jim comes to the rescue with his green laser pointer to BLIND me temporarily and remind me that I am not alone at work.  Hurrah!

I could make this list longer but I don't want everyone to run after my friend Jim to take him away from me.  Everyone will just have to find out on their own how crazy great this assistance coordinator really is.

To Jim, stay cool.  :)

Here's a pic of Jim trying to hide the guilty look after shining the laser pointer in my face. -.- 

More posts to follow.  Nov 11th at 7am is the take-off time for my adventure.  Debating whether I should keep this blog or start another one solely for the trip...  We shall see what happens.  Toodles.

Tomorrow is T Minus One Month

Full medical clearance was obtained.  Now I went through a couple hours of confused posting on Facebook due to a note I read about there being a possible delay on our itineraries as one of the results of the government shutdown.  In fact, my parents heard from another family member that they expected my trip to be cancelled entirely.  My mom was ready to begin celebrating.  -.-  Well, hate to break it to everyone but the trip is still ON!

Shortly after that mix-up was discussed, I received an email from Peace Corps with an itinerary and instructions on how to book my flight for staging.  I had lunch with the parents and burst their bubble as lightly as possible.  :-/  Then I picked up the phone and called the travel agent.  I got the perfect time to depart - Monday, Nov. 11th at 7:25am.  US Airways 1746 departing Chicago O'Hare and arriving in Philly at 10:25am.  Staging begins at noon and then it's a brief orientation before departing the next day.  Wednesday, Nov. 13th is when I am scheduled to actually arrive in Uganda.  I have no words for the excitement I feel.  Just know that it's a good feeling.

I am going through a little anxiety these days as I go through my things and place them in my bags to get an idea of how much I will be able to fit.  I have so many items that are for comfort that I'm afraid it'll fill up at least one bag.  -.-  Who knew I was attached to material items???

I am also loading my new portable external hard drive that I bought yesteryday. 1 TB should be enough.  I am usually pretty random with the movies I watch and as long as I get my favorites with limited Horror flicks, I'm good.  I need a few shows to keep me busy too.  Game of Thrones and Mad Men are at the top of my list and then I'll be taking suggestions.

I bought a camera finally and I am stoked to test it out in the wild.  It's the Sony DSC-WX300.  Smallest, lightest camera I could get with a 20x optical zoom.  I wanted small specifically so I could carry it without drawing too much attention and zoom for when I go to a national park in Uganda to take pictures of the lions and hyenas from a distance.

Now to prep my family for what's ahead.  I love you all and I am not doing this to run away or distance myself.  I am doing this because I believe this is my purpose.

More to come as I get ready... Stay tuned.